Thursday, October 16, 2008

Roger Goodell Is Ruining The NFL

Get out the sparklers Zippy, and put those bottle rockets away. It's once again time for POINTLESS PONDERING, that landmark charred by yesteryear's flames.




Roger Goodell is Badashell for the NFL. How much lower can the game sink before the crowd turns away? He is continuing Paul Tagliabue's erosion of the game. It may be easy to point out the thugs he pretends to show tough love to. The bottom line is his main interest. Even at the expense of the players and the dignity of the game. Every position but running back has been effected by rule changes since 1980. The rule changes got out of control under Tagliabue, a basketball player, and continue to spiral into an insane black hole under the pencil pushing commander of the ship. As I have pondered on in the past, you may as well put the modern day quarterback in a tutu and put flags on his hips. Goodell has made the position almost untouchable for defenders. Pass rushers now have to deal with 300+ pound blockers who get to use their hands, while trying to maintain body control on how they hit a quarterback or attempt to knock down a pass. This same issue holds true for all defenders really. Pretty easy for Goodell, a guy who never played the game, to rush to rash judgments. To make it worse, Gene Washington is on this council. Washington was a Wide Receiver who hated going over the middle in his career, and pretty much ran fly patterns all day to avoid contact. These are the guys trying to tell the defense how to play!

Here are some pictures of Gary "Big Hands" Johnson, Randy "Manster" White, and George Martin. All NFL Greats. Look closely at these pictures. Now imagine if these plays happened in the 2008 version of the NFL. Can you just see the fines and suspensions that Goodell and his cronies would levy?










The quarterback has it so very easy in today's NFL. Not only are they not allowed to be hit, but they get to intentionally ground the ball is they take 3 steps to either side of the pocket. They don't even have to call their own plays. Factor in the horrible tuck rule, the fact that they are robotic with little thought needed, the 5 yard chuck rule, the blockers allowed to extend their hands, and having a ref as a personal bodyguard. It makes one wonder why they get so much money and media push. The NFL has turned it from 11 guys on a team to 10 guys behind the QB. Let us not even talk about how lousy 80% of the NFL QB's are today even with all that help!



Is anyone REALLY upset that the Rays appear headed to the World Series? Will Phillies fans, as loyal to their team as they are, have the same lust in booing them as opposed to any other team? The Rays are just what Major League Baseball needed. Perfect timing, really. After all the steroids talk, the game needed a team like this. Young, full of good players under the guidance of a good manager. They actually remind me of the young Minnesota Twins under Tom Kelly. I don't know if the Rays will get two trophies like the Twins did, but I suspect they will be in the running for the next few years.


I don't babble on college football much, but I did watch a few quarters of Ohio State over 2 games. I just was amazed at the QB Pryor. He already displays an innate ability to lay in a soft touch ball, and has good awareness. Mind you, he is only a freshman. Still, watching him gave me a few thoughts. One was the kid reminds me some of Roger Staubach, and the other was that he may end up with a Heisman by the time he graduates.


What winter sport will you be watching in 3 months? Stern's fixed NBA surely is an option, unless you already have the script of how it'll go (Lakers/ Cavs). The NHL, always the bridesmaid, had a shot and taking a step forward until this week. It may be easy to blame certain incompetencies on Gary Bettman, but it may be more widespread after we all saw that prospect die under shady circumstances. I have no idea how this will unfold beyond an obvious payout to the kids family. I dunno...things aren't very attractive right now for either league. After hearing about those ping pong players fighting, the choice may either be that or MMA?


Did ANYONE notice what rare air Candace Parker just elevated to? Wilt Chamberlain, Wes Unseld, and Candace. NO ONE ELSE. What am I talking about? They are the only three basketball players to ever win Rookie of the Year and League MVP in the same year. To be honest, I didn't see one bounce of the ball in the WNBA this year. Still, this is an achievement to be celebrated by all people who love, or even like, sports.




This is a POINTLESS PONDERING first. A Viewers Poll.

The subject is ESPN's second favorite son = Terrell Owens.




You may know his background growing up. He was raised by his grandmother, who he thought was his mother. He thought his mother was his sister. His dad lived right across the street from him, and avoided him. In fact, he didn't learn any of these facts until he was a young adult. This really explains why the lights are on, but no one is home for this psycho. The question is = If T.O. was unathletic, what would he have grown up to be?

Here are some choices, but you can include your own.

A. A Serial Killer

B. A Male Prostitute

C. Someones Wife In Jail

D. A Pre-Op Transexual

E. A Transvestite/ Female

F. A Respected Member Of Society


Well, it's time to make like a baby and head out. As they like to say in Ol' Mexico = A.M.F.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

When It Was Over

As some of you may know, I tend to post old TSN shtuff on here. Kinda a backup file of sorts. This piece was supposed to be in SYTCB : Week 2, an assignment created by The Electric Quill. I figuered it was worthy of a second home.



Looking through a tunnel of hardened plastic, Brent could see it was over. The distant whistle rang is his ears gently, but the pop of the starters pistol slammed him like a knife to the gut. He could feel hands on him. On his back, head, and derriere. There was a crowd of fans screaming, but not at him. He had long been forgotten by them.

Limping in a clean uniform towards his locker room, the teams trainer was the first to impede his path.

"I am going to miss the times we had together."

Was that it? Brent just nodded in acknowledgment and went forward. In his plastic tunnel, all he could see was his soon to be former team mates filing slowly into the locker room. He wanted that last drop of camaraderie before he drifted into oblivion.

His position coach jogged up beside Brent and offered," You were one of my favorite Running Backs to coach. Even after you lost your ACL."

It didn't mean the world to Brent, but it was a small consolation to take with him to the inevitable.

Seven years in the NFL is what most would read about him if they ever tripped upon his bio on wikipedia. Maybe there would be a mention of his collegiate prowess, though not in great detail. Brent had played at a small college that had never had a game televised nationally. He had never played in a bowl game, nor a college All Star game. He did rush for over 100 yards in 17 games

Brent was drafted in the 8th round by an expansion team that was desperately trying to fill roster spots. Brent didn't even bother to hire an agent. None had contacted him. His family told him to give the NFL a chance, but to remember he should interview for other jobs before training camp in case he was cut. Brent only listened to his mothers advice. She had raised him by herself after his father had left 4 days before Brents 3rd birthday. She never married again, nor dated much. Her energies were spent trying to ensure Brent had everything he desired. She worked long hours at a garment factory for little pay. Brent was a latch-key kid throughout his teenage years. He stayed to himself and read books. He wasn't interested in sports, and hardly ever watched any television. He had no siblings, and would spend his days waiting for his mother to pull herself into the front door after a long shift at work. He saw her determination and told himself that he wanted to be like her in that regard.

Brents life changed in the 11th grade. He had become smitten with a cheerleader. Like many boys his age, he wanted to be near her, but unnoticed. He would sit in the bleachers after school just to watch her do her program. One day he decided he had the courage to approach her. She was a goddess to him. Skin darker than a Hershey's chocolate bar without a blemish. Lips soft and full, and brown eyes that were pools he longed to dive into. What he didn't know was that the quarterback on his high schools football team also wanted to be near her.

Brent trudged across the field towards her as the cheerleaders were gathered on the sideline watching the football team practice. The quarterback saw him and hatched a plan to deter him. He yelled Brents name loud. As Brent turned to look, the ball was inches away from smashing his face. Instinctively he caught the ball with one hand effortlessly. As he cupped the ball, he noticed the team was charging at him while screaming a blood curdling wail. They intended to pile up on him. Brent was wearing his best pair of slacks and knew his mother would be upset if he got grass stains on the cream colored fabric. Brent proceeded to dodge the first group of would be tacklers. He darted through a maze of players as if they were statues, then took off with speed he himself had never known he had. He easily outran the team, and didn't stop running until he was off the school grounds. Trying to catch his breath, Brent realized he was so mad at the stunt that was pulled, he had inadvertently left with the ball still tucked in his arms. The next day, Brent got off the school bus and found the football coach standing there waiting for him.

"Can I please have the football back son?"

Brent handed him the ball and muttered an apology.

"That's OK. I saw what occurred and can't blame you. All I really want to know is why you haven't tried out for my team? I would start you day one if you decided to suit up."

"I have to ask my mom first", Brent told the coach. He figured that playing would be his path to the girl.

After his mother agreed, Brent joined the team and was an instant star. He rushed for 1,684 yards that year, then 1,986 yards the next year. His teams lost more than they won, and few college scouts came to watch him play. One of the few that did was a local school that was small, but they played Division II football. Brent accepted their scholarship offer so his mom wouldn't have to work extra hours to pay for his tuition. Plus, he could live at home and help his mother still. He never did date that girl.

Brent arrived at his first NFL training camp with only 3 days of clothes packed into a backpack. He didn't think he would last long on the team. He had an interview for a job as a computer programmer in a week, so he thought he would have just enough time to make that appointment. The team had spent their first pick on a guy who played Brents position, and had signed 3 veterans as well. He was the smallest of the group, standing 5'8" and weighing 187 pounds. He knew the team wouldn't carry 5 halfbacks on the roster for long either. What he didn't foresee was 3 of his competitors going down with injuries in the first 2 days of camp, one of them being the first round pick. Suddenly Brent was competing against a guy who had played on four NFL teams in two seasons. He figured he could provide depth at the least until one of his injured team mates had healed. He sat on the bench for the first half of his first preseason game. Brent was unsurprised, having been outperformed in camp thus far. He was more nervous than ready when the head coach told him he would carry the ball in the second half. When he jogged onto the field, he could smell the grass only. No sounds were heard other than his pounding heart.

" 21 Blue shift left, heavy set on 3", yelped the rookie quarterback about to take his first NFL snap as well.

Brent knew it was a simple hand off between the Center and Left Guard. He was prepared to fire out of his stance to take advantage of his 4.32 speed. The play unfolded in slow motion. Brent could see that the hole that was supposed to be there wasn't. He let his instinct take over, then bounced outside and took off 80 yards for a touchdown. It was then Brent knew he belonged in the NFL, even if he had just achieved versus a bunch of 4th stringers and free agents.

He went on through preseason ripping off huge chunks of yardage whenever he touched the ball. He was informed that he won the starting job at the conclusion of the final preseason game. He played on a lousy team that year. They won only 2 games. Brent was a big reason for those wins. He had rushed for 225 yards and 3 touchdowns in one win, and 187 yards and 2 touchdowns in the other. Brent ended up with 1,357 yards rushing that season and was named NFL Rookie Of The Year. It would turn out to be the best season of his career, because Brent would blow out his left knee during a team agility drill during his second training camp. He ended up missing the entire season. During that year, the first round draft pick was fully recovered and went on to make the All Pro team after rushing for 1,732 yards.

Brent did come back to the team for his third season, but as a backup. He would only get 112 carries over the next 2 seasons, gaining 397 yards. He had lost his burst and never had gained it back. He was determined to try and find it again for his sixth year. He didn't. He ended up carrying the ball only 33 times that year and gained only 87 yards. Brent could see his career was ending in front of his eyes. His team had made the playoffs, so he guessed he was playing out his final game riding the bench.

Fate intervened again for Brent during that playoff game. His team was losing 24-0 as the first half was winding down. Then, the first round pick was injured on a simple sweep run as the clock expired. He was ruled out for the rest of the game. Suddenly, Brent was back on the field. Brent felt weird in the pit of his stomach during halftime. He felt that he was ineffective the last few years, but his team needed him now. He ran onto the field, passing most of his solemn team mates.

Brent exploded in that second half. It seemed like old times for him. He could see 3 steps ahead of the defenders as always, but suddenly his long lost burst had decided to rear its head again. He ran wild during the 3rd quarter,. Brent gained 142 yards and scored 3 touchdowns. One was a 93 yard jaunt down the sidelines off of a screen pass. His team was down by 3 points going into the 4th quarter. It also turned out to be the best quarter Brent had ever played in his life. After watching his opponents score a touchdown on a kick return, then another on a fumble return on the ensuing kickoff, his teams hopes to continue their season looked grim to all except Brent. He would run for 201 yards that quarter, shattering NFL records for most yards rushing in a playoff quarter and game. But it was the last yard that would do him in.


With his team now down 7 points, and with the ball back, Brent saw there was only 23 seconds left on the game clock. The ball was placed on his own 37 yard line. The play called was a basic draw play, in hopes it would get them a solid 10 yards or more. More it did. Brent took the ball and bounced outside. Following his tight end, he ran 15 yards untouched before the tight end collided with a defender. Brent cut inside and blazed across the field. He could hear the roar of the crowd dull. He zig-zagged between more defenders and saw the goal line just 20 yards away from him. As he ran towards the end zone, Brent felt a defender coming up on him. He looked over to his right and saw the defender about 3 steps away from tackling him. Brent decided if he pulled up for a split second, the defender would over run his angle, thus making it an easy score. As Brent pulled up, he heard a pop but felt nothing. As he planted his left foot to the ground, he crumbled in a heap. His surgically ACL had torn again. He knew it. Brent was carted off the field, but refused to go to the locker room to see if his team would score. They didn't. Brent spent the next 3 weeks running that play in his head over and over. When he finally went to see Dr. James Andrews, a renowned orthopedic surgeon, he was told his left knee was beyond repair. His ACL was then taken out of his knee, and he was told he would need knee replacement surgery later on in his life. Basically, he would never be the same, and walk with a permanent limp. Brent was kept on the practice squad in his last year the following season. It was mostly a "Thank You" from the team for his efforts during his career. They allowed him to suit up for the season finale, but there was never any intention on playing him.

As he was about to leave the gridiron for the final time, Brent turned around and looked at the field. He wanted to sprint to the other end of the field. He wanted to keep running until he left the stadium. He wanted to touch the ball again, but never give it back this time. He wanted.....he wanted. Yet all he could do was sigh and try to summon a slight smile. It was over. That kind of want now belonged to someone else.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Karma Bit The Cowboys Dogma

Watching the Dallas Cowboys lose in Arizona Sunday just reminded me of the weaknesses I had pointed out before the season even kicked off. Yes, the Cowboys have a few very skilled players, but they must have ignored what the New York Giants did in their 2007 playoff run to a Super Bowl XLII win. Their front line on both sides of the ball borderlines between mediocre and poor. Watching teams saunter through their blockers with ease is a prime example of what I mean. The Cowboys are lucky that Tony Romo has only broken a pinkie finger so far

The officiating this past Sunday was a debacle, so it was indeed karma that Arizona prevailed. From the terrible "tuck rule" that cost Arizona 6 points, to the blown call that gave the Cowboys the 5 yards they needed to take the game into overtime. When a defensive player is injured, there is supposed to be a timeout called immediately. The 20 minutes of confusion that led up to the wrong call just highlights the fact that the NFL needs to hire full time referees like Major League Baseball does. If that isn't fiscally prudent, then get guys who know the rule book.

Now Brad Johnson is set to start at least a few games. With the way the offensive line has been overmatched all season, there is a good chance that Brooks Bollinger may get on the field. Neither guy has a good arm, but the 40 year old Johnson knows how to manage a game. Marion Barber is in his first year as a featured back since high school. With Felix Jones now out a few games, his mettle will be tested more than ever before. Perhaps Tashard Choice will get a few carries? Now that teams will be able to double Terrell Owens and Jason Witten due to the lack of Johnson's arm strength, expect extra defenders in the box often. You think T.O., who cried about his lack of use after getting a third of the plays called his way, will keep quiet during this time? Expect venom and tears if losses follow.

Another woeful part of the Cowboys arsenal right now is their defensive line. After watching the Washington Redskins dominate them two weeks ago, some expected change. It did, though Arizona's major weakness all season has been their rushing attack. Still, the very immobile Kurt Warner was not sacked until late in the 4th quarter. Marcus Spears has shown some improvement so far this year, but other than Jay Ratliff, the rest of the Cowboys defensive line has been inconsistent. To make matters worse for the defense, Roy Williams and Terence Newman have been injured and Adam Jones looks like a guy who hasn't played football since 2007. Newman will be out a month, but Williams return may be any week now. On a positive note, rookie Cornerback Orlando Scandrick appears to be a steal and is outperforming 2008 first round pick Mike Jenkins so far.

The onus of the Cowboys successes the next few weeks, and maybe their playoff hopes, will not rest squarely on the shoulders of guys like Barber, Johnson, Owens, Witten, or Ware. The fortunes rest mostly on the level of play performed in the trenches. After facing the Rams this Sunday, they will have to go up against the Buccaneers, Giants, and Redskins the following three weeks. All teams who rely on controlling the line of scrimmage to win. This is the style of play that gets you far into the playoffs as well. With Romo possibly missing all four of these games, you may be seeing Jerry Jones master plan for a 2008 Super Bowl win go up in smoke by November 16.

Monday, October 13, 2008

When A Name Is Not Just Words

FAIR HOOKER





The football player



Fair was a 5th round draft choice of the Cleveland Browns in 1969. He went to college at Arizona State University. At ASU, Fair lettered in track and football. He was part of an impressive receivers corps at ASU. John Pitts and J.D. Hill would both be drafted in the first round by the Buffalo Bills, albeit 4 years apart. Larry Walton was drafted by the Detroit Lions the same year Hooker was. Pitts would play Safety for the Bills, while Hill earned 1 Pro Bowl berth. 1968 was Hookers biggest year on the ASU gridiron. He caught 42 passes for 665 yards. Both were school records at the time, and led the team. He also caught 6 touchdown passes. He was All-Wac that year too in track. He won the 120 yard hurdles with a time of 14 seconds.





One of his biggest NFL moments came in 1972. The Browns went 10-4 and earned a Wild Card berth. They faced the Miami Dolphins, who were in the midst of completing the only perfect season in modern day NFL history. Cleveland gave Miami all they could handle that day. Fair caught a big touchdown pass from Mike Phipps in the 4th quarter. This put the Browns up 14-13. Miami squeaked out a win on a late touchdown.



Fair Hooker played 6 seasons in the NFL. He didn't play much on offense his rookie year, catching 2 passes. He became a bigger part of the Browns offense by his second season. He caught 28 passes and scored the first 2 touchdowns of his career. His 3rd NFL season was in 1971. It turned out to be the best season of his career. He established his career highs in catches and reception yardage that year. He ended up with 45 catches for 649 yards. He scored once that year as well. He caught 32 passes the next season, to go with 2 touchdowns. Hooker got hurt in 1973, and caught 18 passes and scored twice. Fair was only able to play 7 games in 1974. He caught 4 passes and scored the last touchdown of his career. He retired after that season. In total, Fair Hooker had 129 receptions for 1,845 yards at a 14.3 YPC average. Hooker also scored 8 touchdowns.





Fair Hooker certainly has one of the most unique names in all of sports history.



He had an excellent career in sports as well.


Friday, October 10, 2008

1975: Best NFL Draft Ever For Defensive Tackles?

During my Crazy Canton Cuts series, I have come across several outstanding drafts to review. Whether its coming across a Hall of Fame player drafted early or late in drafts, it is fun to see.

The 1975 draft caught my eye especially for defensive lineman. Rams and Chargers fans may remember this year as being one of the best overall drafts in their teams histories, as both found seven starters each. San Diego drafted five starters on defense alone.

Here is a review of how excellent that draft that was for linemen especially.

San Diego Chargers :

All they did was draft two multiple Pro Bowl defensive tackles in Gary "Big Hands" Johnson and Louie Kelcher. Then they drafted Hall of Fame defensive end Fred Dean. They also drafted cornerback Mike Williams and safety Mike Fuller. They even added offensive tackle Billy Shields and running back Rickey Young.

Young would later be traded to Minnesota for legendary guard Ed White, where he once caught 88 passes. That was an NFL record for running backs for many years.

After dominating for the Bolts, Johnson, Kelcher, and Dean would go on to help the 49ers win a Super Bowl together.










Los Angeles Rams:

The got guard Dennis Harrah, a Crazy Canton Cut profilee, and offensive tackle Doug France for their offensive line. Both were multiple Pro Bowlers.

They also got two serviceable defensive linemen in defensive tackle Mike Fanning and defensive end Leroy Jones. The Rams drafted Pro Bowl quarterback Pat Haden, and Pro Bowl cornerbacks Monte Jackson and Rod Perry as well.







Dallas Cowboys :

You COULD only say they drafted Hall of Fame defensive tackle Randy White. Leaving it at the Manster would work.

Yet, they also drafted three starting linebackers in Thomas "Hollywood" Henderson, Mike Hegman, and Bob Bruenig.

They also drafted two multiple Pro Bowlers for the offensive line in guard Herbert Scott, and offensive tackle Pat Donovan. They even added special teams gunner Scott Laidlaw, who helped at running back too.






San Francisco 49ers :

They drafted two starting defensive tackles in Jimmy Webb and Cleveland Elam. Elam lasted just four full years in the NFL, but made two Pro Bowls in his injury riddled career. Pro Bowl guard Ed White said Hall of Fame defensive tackle Bob Lilly was the best player he ever faced, but said Elam was just as good when he was healthy.

Remember, White faced Hall of Famers Alan Page and Fred Dean, as well as Gary Johnson and Louie Kelcher, in practice every day for years. This is high praise for a man who knows greatness first hand.

Webb also battled injuries in his six NFL seasons, but was solid. Another guy drafted that year was wide receiver Freddie Soloman, but by Miami. 49er fans surely remember him.

Cleveland Elam





Denver Broncos :

The Broncs got two key members of their famous Orange Crush defense that year. cornerback Louis Wright, a Crazy Canton Cut profilee, and defensive tackle Rubin Carter. They also drafted wide receiver Rick Upchurch, a great punt returner, and safety Steve Foley. They could have drafted linebacker Robert Brazile too, but they had traded that pick to Houston.






Detroit Lions:

They drafted multiple Pro Bowl Defensive Tackle Doug English. They also added Running Back Horace King, and Wide Receiver Leonard Thompson.





There were some good defensive ends drafted that year. Here's a few :


Chicago Bears :

Not only did they get defensive end Mike Hartenstine, but they drafted a few running backs you may have heard of. Hall of Famer Walter Payton and Roland Harper. They added strong safety Doug Plank, quarterback Bob Avellini, and guard Revie Sorey too. Hartenstine laid one of the most brutal hits I ever witnessed on a quarterback. It was on Ron Jaworski. Of course, it knocked him out of the game.

Jaws was back the next week though to set the record for consecutive starts by a quarterback eventually. If this hit took place today, the NFL might have banned Hartenstine for life.

Ahhhh, when MEN played FOOTBALL!

WISH I could show you, but the No Fun League took the clip off of youtube






The New York Giants drafted George Martin. He scored five touchdowns in his 14 year career with the Big Blue. Many know what a great player George was, but I'd like to mention what a great man he is. George recently walked across the ENTIRE United States for a 9/11 charity. He raised money and awareness, but most importantly, he raised the spirits of many! Bless you George Martin!!










In summary, you see a few Hall of Famers in Randy White and Fred Dean. Two guys are on the Canton fringe in Gary Johnson and Doug English. Carter and Kelcher were fantastic as well. Elam was one of the best in his short time, and guys like Webb and Fanning were very solid.

What do you think? If you know of a better class of DT's in one draft : tell me

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

FIRE UP AMERICA!

Cheech & Chong have made millions laugh over the course of their careers, and are looking to keep that tradition alive today. Many fans know the duo from their legendary movies like "Up In Smoke", "Next Movie", "Nice Dreams", and more. Some younger fans may know Cheech from his work with Disney Films, Robert Rodriguez, and Quintin Tarantino. For those who have yet to know these guys, there is an interesting story behind their union, break up, and reunion.


Back in the 1960's, Tommy Chong owned a bar in Canada. The bar hosted musical and comedy acts. Chong was a successful musician himself, having co-written at 1968 Motown hit titled. "Does Your Mama Know About Me", which was recorded by the Jackson 5 and others. Richard "Cheech" Marin was up in Canada with a comedy troupe, and ended up at Chong's establishment. The two hit it off as friends quickly, then decided to team up as comedians. The duo ended up establishing a stage act, with such characters like "Ralph and Herbie", the infamous "Dave's Not Here", and many more comedic gems. These acts popularity soon had them playing in Los Angeles. There, they were heard on stage by a record executive. He signed the duo, and Cheech and Chong would go on to win four Grammy Awards with their first three albums. After a tour of America, they decided to try the silver screen.


1978's "Up In Smoke" brought the guys instant success. It is considered a classic movie by many, and featured young actors like Tom Skerritt, Stacey Keach, Ellen Barkin, and Harry Dean Stanton. "Cheech and Chong's Next Movie" soon followed two years later. Pee Wee Herman, Edie McClurg, Rita Wilson, Michael Winslow, and the late Phil Hartman were all young actors in the movie who would later become noted stars. "Nice Dreams" followed the next year, and this movie is considered by some to be their best movie. Sandra Bernhard, Keach, Winslow, Herman, Peter Jason, and the late Dr. Timothy Leary were amongst the cast. "Things Are Tough All Over" followed in 1983. Comedians like George Wallace, Dave Coulier, and Rip Taylor appeared in the movie. After "Still Smokin", a movie parody of their stage act, followed the next year, the guys made the "Corsican Brothers" in 1984. Tommy's beautiful daughters, Rae Dawn Chong and Robbi Chong, appeared in the movie. By 1985, the duo was about to perform their last works together. Cheech parlayed "Get Out Of My Room" into a solo movie titled, "Born In East LA". Cheech and Chong then had a recurring role as two thieves in Martin Scorsese's highly acclaimed "After Hours". By then, Cheech had his eyes set on a solo career.

Though there are varying stories about the duo's split, the last appearance the two made on film together was when Cheech made a very brief cameo appearance in Chong's "Far Out Man", a 1990 movie that co-starred many of Chongs family. Since then, the two had not worked together in the same room since. They did provide their voices for an episode of South Park in 2000, but did so from different locations. Both have enjoyed very successful careers on their own since the 1985 split, but fans have spent the last 23 years hoping for this reunion. Though there was once talk of bringing Cheech and Chong's recurring movie characters, Pedro and Man, back onto the silver screen a few years ago. It never happened, but the guys are filming this tour, and plan to turn it into a movie.

This may be a one time thing. It has taken the legendary duo 23 years to work together again. Chong is now 70 years old, and Cheech is 62. Though many hope for many more bits from these comedic geniuses, there certainly are no guarantees on this reunion. If you are a fan of their comedy, or good comedy in general, this may be a once in a lifetime opportunity for you to view these fantastic artists. Tickets are on sale, so hurry and procure yours. A VIP package to meet the duo is available.

Go to http://www.cheechandchong.com/news/ to find out if they come near you.



Here is a link to how they look today on the current issue of High Times:

http://www.zinio.com/express3?issue=293217234&pss=1

BTW = Tommy? THANK YOU for RAE DAWN!!!

Monday, October 6, 2008

Bank On It

Another old TSN post:


I went to a fortune teller a few weeks ago while visiting a friend in another city. I wrote these predictions down, hoping to cash in at Vegas. Granted, the fortune teller was a wino I had bought a bottle of Mad Dog 20/20 for, but he did say that his nick name was Nostrodamus. We'll see. My mortgage and kids college funds are riding on this:



Dan Snyder will continue collecting has-beens as if they were playing cards when he pulls out a page from the George Allen playbook and trades three #1 draft picks, and two #2 draft picks for Brett Farve. Farve then blows out his knee stepping over his new team mates for a better picture angle for the paparazzi, is placed on the IR, then retires in December. Farve then un-retires in January and cries on FOX TV, as Bill O'Reilly hugs him. Redskins GM Vinny Cerrato then announces he has traded Farve, two #1 draft picks, and a #6 draft pick to Oakland for Aaron Brooks and the rights to George Blanda. Brooks whereabouts are never ascertained, but Blanda kicks 21 field goals on 30 attempts and throws 11 touchdown passes in 2009. Farve rides the bench as a third stringer behind JeMarcus Russell and Andrew Walter, then retires for the final time.



George W. Bush, still struggling to try to lose the label of being the worst President in US history, will announce he may pardon Marion Jones. But only on the contingency that Roger Clemons is not found guilty of perjury, and that Jose Canseco never writes a book showing Bush knew his Rangers were on steroids, when Bush owned the team, and even supplied the clubhouse with syringes and HGH. Bush then quietly pays Canseco $2,000 to never write about how Bush and Juan Gonzales both did lines of coke off of Tom Hicks' taint in 1998. Bush then goes on a hunting trip with Dick Cheney and is shot in the buttocks by Cheney "by accident". It takes doctors 3 weeks to determine Bush is brain dead due to no changes in Bush's speech or thought patterns.




Adam Jones announces his now wants to be called "Galaga". He then makes the Cowboys offices "rain money" after asking Jerry Jones to give him a lap dance. A melee ensues, and Stephen Jones is shot and paralyzed from the neck down. Adam Jones is suspended by Roger Goodell for 11 months. When reinstated, Adam Jones announces he now wants to be called "Frogger".




Nancy Lieberman recants her previous statement of calling Becky Hammon a traitor. Lieberman then promptly defects to Cuba to be Fidel Castro's private night nurse.



The WNBA announces that every Wednesday will be "Fight Night" in hopes to increase viewership. After that fails, they have the players wear bikinis and wrestle in a swimming pool of chocolate pudding on Wednesdays "Fight Nights". Attendance and interest remains unchanged.





The Cubs get to the World Series and have Steve Bartman throw out the first pitch. Geovany Soto takes his eye off the ball and ends up having his right orbital socket crushed, rendering him out for the series. The Cubs commit 37 errors as the Red Sox sweep the series. Bartman is blamed for the loss and becomes the Salman Rushdie of Chicago. Bartman moves to Tehran and goes into hiding. Lou Pinella is then fired.





Alex Rodriguez marries 50 year old Madonna in a lavish ceremony in the Beverly Hills Hilton. Instead of exchanging wedding rings, they swap kabbala bracelets and kabbala nipple rings. The press dubs him "Nim-Rod". Six months later, Rodriguez passes away by succumbing to complications from the multiple STD's that he contracted from Madonna on their honeymoon. George Steinbrenner demands his contract be fulfilled, and Madonna ends up playing 3rd base for the Yankees. The entire organization goes defunct within 15 months due to every member dying from contacting multiple STD's from Madonna. Madonna then releases her 12th CD, titled, "Those Damn Yankees Were Damn Good".